do the right questions elude you?

May 15, 2011 at 4:28 am 2 comments

While on the phone with an old friend, she asked me what I had been up to recently. It took me a while to compile my life in a few short words. But I need not have worried, as I completed my statement regarding our Foster Closet, a barrage of questions began flowing.

“Explain to me what that is,” she said. The questions kept trickling in from there. She was really interested in taking the idea and putting it to use in another county. I was surprised at the inquiries she made.

I was excited that this friend of mine had so many questions. That the subject had to do with helping foster kids was probably beneficial. (Something I’m very passionate about.) Then again, I probably liked her approach because it’s similar to my own. You see, I am the queen of asking questions. Maybe there’s someone out there who can knock me off my throne to the rank of princess. That I wouldn’t mind. I do, however, have a problem asking the right questions. I would embarrass myself if I went down the list of projects or ventures I have delved into without doing so properly.

That wasn’t the case when my husband and I decided to adopt through foster care. This is a monumental life decision, and we asked hundreds of questions before we started. We wanted, not only to know what to expect, but how to help the kids. We thought others with experience would be helpful in guiding us forward.

As others we have come in contact with decide to do foster-to-adopt, I have been disappointed in their lack of inquiries. One aquaintance decided to do foster care. After the child had been in their home for a period of time, the mom said to me, “No one tells you how emotionally taxing this (fostering) is.” She wasn’t told because she never asked any questions. If they had, I would have shared just that.

So, how about you? Do you ask the right questions? Are others annoyed with you when you do?

Do you do the same thing when going into a new venture; whether it be for business, philanthropy, or just for fun? How prepared are you when you begin something new?

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the subject changer. the interrupter. no one asks the hard questions

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Tracy Dee Whitt - Author

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